GM Wint ~ Prologue
Videogames - GM Wint
Monday, 23 March 2009 20:06

prologue

Greetings, readers, my name is Game Master Wint. Could I please have a moment of your time regarding the story behind GMs?

Sorry, I couldn't help myself. Well, my name is GM Wint, and I'm going to try to enlighten people to the daily life of a GM. I will try to make this as entertaining as possible, while keeping things informative. Hope you like it. :)

I arrived in France a day before I was due to enter the Blizzard offices as a fresh-faced noob, landing in Paris CDG airport and making the buttock-numbing journey by train to Velizy with a suitcase filled with naught but the most important things for a geek's survival; a laptop, an external hard drive full of movies and anime, WoW, and some fresh undies. Everything else I would procure on site like an anaemic Solid Snake on a mission to battle robots from space.

The first day at Blizzard - and the next two weeks thereafter - was as I was expecting; theory. We were strapped into our chairs and given strange headgear to wear. Little did I know at the time that the headgear was a mind-altering device to implant the Blizzard Employee Manual into my brain and remove any semblance to human thought. The transition from ordinary noob to GM had begun, and I embraced it as though it were my teddy bear.

Locked in our minds now were the teachings of our Divine Order, a few of them being:

- Abuse of power for personal gains; such as creating gold, items, and spawning rare monsters is strictly prohibited.

- Secrets of the workplace remain in the workplace. Phone cameras, digital cameras, and other recording hardware is to be kept off the premises.

- Co-workers make good paper-ball target practice. This practice is encouraged.

- The vending machine's out of Coca Cola.

In this two week period of training and brainwashing we also made our characters and played around as GMs on a test server. Great fun! I obviously made myself a female Dwarf for Alliance and a male Tauren for my Horde relations. I deduced that these were the two cutest characters of their respective factions and would win me the most favour when appearing in-game to players.

"I obviously made myself a female Dwarf for Alliance and a male Tauren for my Horde relations. I deduced that these were the two cutest characters of their respective factions and would win me the most favour when appearing in-game to players."

I have been asked a few times by both players (and friends who knew I was a GM): "Why do GMs have such weird names?" Secrecy, dear Watson. We're spies for a big organisation, planning to rule the world with our cuddly Gnomish and Tauren avatars.

It's funny because it's true.

After our training is complete we are carted, dribbling and braindead - save for information about policies and how to press macros - to begin our lives as proper GMs. Not without visiting the break room for a plastic cup of lukewarm coffee and a bag of M&Ms, of course.

Armed with my M&Ms I was ready to venture into the world of a fully fledged GM, answering those tickets and putting everyone's minds at rest. I was more prepared than James Bond and his gadgets could ever be. Or so I thought.

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