IT'S a nice looking portable media player. We can't even bring ourselves to get angry.

We don't watch Star Trek. Star Trek's for geeks. Yes, if you push us, we might admit we've watched the old one on BBC2 on a Sunday when we've been hungover. And yes, we might even admit to you that we enjoyed it, albeit in a knowing ironic way. And perhaps, in our heads, we'd admit to ourselves that we enjoyed it in a non-ironic way. But we're not "into" it, because we're the cool kind of geek, with modern asymmetrical haircuts and Atari t-shirts and VAIO laptops and ipod docks in our minimalist city apartments, not - repeat not - the bad kind of geek that hangs around in Games Workshop until 9pm despite being 35 years old. If you met us, you'd definitely want to sleep with us. Unless you're a straight man. And even then we'd probably confuse you.

So with that out of the way, let's boldly go where inferior shed-based tech news sources have doubtless gone before, and talk about that gadget thing in Star Trek. You know, the handheld ones they use to do fancy stuff and talk to each other. Back in the 1860s when the series was made, such technology existed only inside the twisted dreams of the clinically insane. Nowadays it's everywhere, with hundreds of pocket sized whatnots boasting increasingly incredible tricks to coax you out of your hard earned, or ill gotten, money.

But while the brave space explorers of the Starship Enterprise were concerned only with life-saving utility, we terrestrial types value a different kind of property as we navigate the urban jungle - looks. It was the clean, futuristic simplicity of the iPod which propelled it from desirable device to must have phenomenon, and that's because we're primarily visual creatures. And that's why we're horrendously impressed with the new LG FM37, out in shops this very month. It's got wow factor coming out of its ears. In fact, we had to genetically engineer a human ear onto the side of ours just so the wow factor had a place to escape, otherwise it would have exploded.

What is it? Well, it's a space age mini media player with 2GB or 4GB of space, tasty video playback, great music and photo performance and drag-and-drop file uploading from Windows. And not only is it jaw droppingly sleek, it's also button free, operated via the superbly crisp 2.4inch touchscreen. Its menu navigation is pretty dreadful and the battery life could be a little better, at under 20 hours for music and three to four hours for video, but you'll forgive it. Because we can confidently say that this little unit would make Captain Kirk himself jealous. And he had a space ship and everything.