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Videogames -
Reviews
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Written by Murphy Simmonds
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Tekken 6
PSP/PS3/X360 (X360 version played)
Namco Bandai
In real life, our experience of hitting people until they fall over is limited at best. In fact, when it comes to human-on-human violence, we've generally been on the receiving end. We still carry the scars of a rough encounter with an angry prostitute back in 2004 - we asked her to dress up like a Teletubby, she beat us unconscious with a table lamp and stole our wallet - and two years in a Cuban jail have left us with so much internal bruising that we can barely sneeze without crying. So we've always appreciated the chance to uncage our inner Tyson via the medium of interactive entertainment, and when we're not blistering our thumbs with a spot of Street Fighter, our combat venue of choice is Tekken.
Outside of its arcade home, the Tekken tale is one of three console generations. The PlayStation saw the series grow from eye-popping (for the time) debut to its arguable peak in Tekken 3, one of the finest 3D fighters ever created. PS2 brought problems, a stilted Tekken Tag updating little more than looks, followed by the inexplicably dull Tekken 4 and an eventual return to form in Tekken 5. 6 finally brings the series to PS3 and X360, and it's smorgasbord of characters, modes and graphical flourishes does everything possible to distract us from the truth: the game is getting old.
 Yes, Tekken should feel like Tekken, but we loyal fans cannot help that its mechanics are hard-wired into our neurones. It is not our fault that Taekwondo-ing Heihachi to the ground with Hwoarang feels just like it did in 1998, nor is it our fault that we want the impossible: a game which gives us what it always has, but also something new. Innovations like multi-levelled arenas and an offensive damage boost for the almost-beaten are not enough, and today's graphics do few favours, substituting the satisfying chunkiness of the past with movement which is altogether too smooth, too shiny.
Yet for those whose lives feature a hole shaped like a next-gen Tekken, number six remains a must buy. It offers an exhaustive fighter roster, a generous crop of new combatants (including a robot girl who flings her detached head at people) extensive character customisation, a glut of solo modes and the imperfect, but nonetheless present, ability to challenge others online.
Street Fighter IV has shown that revolution can be beautiful, but Tekken 6, like its Namco stablemate Soul Calibur, has settled with simply growing fatter in its old age. Still, never mind. This is still Tekken, beloved, comfortable, familiar - and we wouldn't be without it for the world.
8/10
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